


The Lonely Princess

by Blaire_Seton



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: Banter, Betaed, Canon Universe, Curse Breaking, Emotionally Constipated Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Fairy Tale Elements, Fairy Tale Parody, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Loves Jaskier | Dandelion, Happy Ending, Humor, Jaskier | Dandelion Loves Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, M/M, Magic, Mutual Pining, Princes & Princesses, Short One Shot, Spells & Enchantments, Swearing, True Love's Kiss, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:08:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26231689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blaire_Seton/pseuds/Blaire_Seton
Summary: Once upon a time there was a princess who fell in love with a witcher. True love? Evil curses? Happy endings? Perhaps. But fairy tales are not what they used to be.‘Who is it?’ Geralt asked, his deep, low voice resonating in the silence of the cottage.‘You know bloody well who the fuck this is. Let me in,’ a sweet, musical voice announced from behind the door. It took him just a few seconds to lose his patience. ‘Geralt?’ He kicked the door with annoyance. ‘You can’t be serious.’Geralt rolled his eyes and looked at the princess, apologetically. ‘That’s just my… bard. This will only take a moment,’ he said, quietly so the person behind the door wouldn’t hear.‘Oh, just your bard, you bastard?’ the voice snapped back. ‘I have absolute pitch and can hear you clear as day. Be warned, I’ll make motherfucking sure to take all the time I need, just wait and see.’
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 36
Kudos: 193





	The Lonely Princess

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LovelyRita](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LovelyRita/gifts).



> Although the real world is invading our perfect fic heaven, we should persist!
> 
> Thank you for being a wonderful friend and the best beta ❤️
> 
> Please check out [Rita's brilliant writing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LovelyRita1967/pseuds/LovelyRita1967) if you haven't already. Her Geraskier romcoms are charming, sweet and clever ❤️

Once upon a time in a land far, far away there was a beautiful princess. Hated by her influential, evil younger sisters, and banished from her kingdom, she lived in constant terror. A target for ruthless assassins, surrounded by deadly traps and blood-thirsty monsters, she fought for her life. In desperation, she sought the help of a famous witcher, Geralt of Rivia. 

Geralt cut down her pursuers with a few graceful swings of his sword. He swirled in the air, his fluid movements both elegant and deadly, blood spilling, screams ringing in her ears. Poisoned apples, arsenic in hot chocolate, arrows suddenly shooting from dark windows of abandoned houses, old ladies turning into gorgons, nothing seemed to faze him. Somehow, he single-handedly chased away the stormy clouds of her fears. With him protecting her, her paralyzing panic dissolved into a warm feeling of trust and safety. 

Then, imperceptibly, her reliance on him turned into something more.

One day, as they were hiding in a little cottage at the edge of the forest, she looked at him sharpening his sword. His face appeared soft in the warm glow of the fireplace. She was just about to confess her feelings to him, when a loud knock on the door made her jump.

‘Who is it?’ Geralt asked, his deep, low voice resonating in the silence of the cottage. 

‘You know bloody well who the fuck this is. Let me in,’ a sweet, musical voice announced from behind the door. It took him just a few seconds to lose his patience. ‘Geralt?’ He kicked the door with annoyance. ‘You can’t be serious.’

Geralt rolled his eyes and looked at the princess, apologetically. ‘That’s just my… bard. This will only take a moment,’ he said, quietly so the person behind the door wouldn’t hear.

‘Oh, just your bard, you bastard?’ the voice snapped back. ‘I have absolute pitch and can hear you clear as day. Be warned, I’ll make motherfucking sure to take all the time I need, just wait and see.’

Geralt blinked a few times and opened the door.

The princess saw a youngish-looking overdressed man, with messy brown hair, hands on his hips, and pure outrage written all over his face. He looked at Geralt, eyes narrowing, and then looked down, both hands pointing at his destroyed trousers. His knees were covered in dry mud, fabric torn in multiple places. ‘Did you not see me running behind Roach this morning?’ he asked.

‘No.’

‘Well, I ran. And I slipped. It was quite impressive.’

Geralt didn’t seem convinced. ‘You expect me to believe you didn’t change right away?’

The man flinched, annoyed. ‘I didn’t… for the sake of a dramatic entrance,’ he admitted with a huff. 

‘Ah.’ 

‘Didn’t you see me wave when you were passing through the town?’

‘I did.’

‘And it didn’t occur to you to stop?’

‘I’m working.’

‘Sure. You’re always fucking working these days, as long as that work takes you far, far away from me.’

‘Jaskier, this is not the time.’

‘Of course it’s not, it never fucking is. It’s been _weeks_.’ He was furious and there was no stopping him.

‘Jaskier-’

‘I know what you’re doing, you know? It’s the oldest trick in the book. I won’t be dismissed like this. I know how this goes. It finally happens… and then the man magically disappears. Poof! I wake up to a fucking cloud of smoke.’

‘Don’t-’

Jaskier was fuming. ‘You fucking coward,’ he seethed.

Geralt stepped back, calm but the first cracks in his composure were beginning to show. ‘Could you just-’

‘No, Geralt. I can’t _just_ , that’s the point.’ He licked his lips, and took a deep breath, attempting to calm down. ‘If I was a fucking stranger, it would be understandable, to an extent. But oh…' He laughed sadly at the thought. ‘I’m so far from a stranger, Geralt. So fucking far.’ He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, and rubbed his fingers together, nervously. ‘If you had a grain of respect…’ he continued. ‘Any fucking inkling of what it feels like to be abandoned so you can go be some macho, monster-killing protector of fair maidens.’ He stared at Geralt with suspicion. ‘Are you compensating for something?’

The princess walked up to the door, a bit shaken by the situation. Geralt’s eyes passively followed her before he turned back to Jaskier. ‘I need you to leave,’ he stated simply, and Jaskier seemed hurt, eyes a bit glassy. 

Jaskier inhaled sharply, ready to retort but then stopped himself. ‘You know what?’ he said, finally, voice controlled. ‘I don’t care. Stay with fucking…’

‘…Flora,’ she added, shyly. 

‘Flora, thank you.’ He looked towards her for a moment and bowed his head a bit before turning back to Geralt. ‘So proper, pretty and nice. She’s…’

‘…a princess,’ she said with some pride, and Jaskier nodded in acknowledgment.

‘Impressive, Geralt, well done. I wish you both all the best. I’m sure Geralt will look extremely attractive with a crown on his head. I can already picture it... the prestige, the class, the elegance.’ Suddenly a thought hit him, and he blinked a few times. ‘Wait… _the_ princess Flora?’ 

‘Yes.’

‘Your story is all the rage amongst the royals. So much compassion for your banishment.’ 

‘Really?’ She seemed surprised.

‘Especially in Redenia. They would take you in, no second thoughts. Prince Phillip is desperate to find you. He commissioned multiple ballads about your golden hair and charming smile, so sentimental. Valdo Marx wrote some truly abysmal stanzas about your teeth. Whoever thinks teeth is the right angle?’ Jaskier rolled his eyes.

‘Fucking teeth,’ Geralt muttered under his breath.

‘Right?’ Jaskier turned to Geralt, and both nodded in agreement for a moment.

Then Jaskier turned to her, attentive. ‘There’s no reason for you to keep running. You’re completely fine.’

‘Oh.’

‘What was I saying?’ Jaskier was distracted again. ‘Oh, I found this at the threshold.’ He held out a neatly packaged present with a fancy, silk bow. He was surprised when both Flora and Geralt moved away slightly. ‘It’s just a present, nothing scary. I know some of us have issues accepting nice things but let’s be reasonable about this.’ 

‘Jaskier, put that down,’ Geralt growled, instantly turning from frustrated to protective. ‘Throw it the fuck away.’

‘Now you care, don’t you?’

‘Put. It. Down.’

Jaskier shook his head, eyes set on Geralt. ‘So _invested_ all of a sudden. Who would have imagined?’ He pulled on the bow, enjoying Geralt’s nervousness. 

‘Don’t be a fucking idiot.’ Geralt launched forwards, and grabbed the box. Jaskier pulled back. It split. Something tiny and swift slipped out of the tear and ran up Jaskier’s arm. Before either of them managed to respond, the creature bit Jaskier and disappeared. 

‘Fuck, Geralt,’ Jaskier squealed, not a trace of previous annoyance in his voice. He stared down in disbelief. ‘My feet! I can’t feel them! Or move them! I’m… turning into stone?’ he whined, half scared, half offended by the ridiculousness of the predicament. 

‘Shit,’ Geralt hissed, frantically looking through the box. He found a letter and read it hastily. ‘Fuck,’ he summarised.

‘What?’

‘It’s one of these curses that needs true love’s kiss to be lifted.’

‘I thought these were just legends,’ he whispered, already contemplating the possibilities.

‘That’s what it says.’

‘Well, fine.’ Jaskier was in no place to argue. He could already feel his knees turning numb. ‘Just do it.’

‘What? Me? Are you joking?’

‘Well, who do you think? I’m sure this will work, relax.’ He gave it a second thought, and suddenly panicked a bit. ‘Does it say if it needs to be reciprocated?’

‘It doesn’t go into _that_ much detail.’

‘Then just do it. I’m not asking for much, am I? I mean… if it’s going to save my life.’

Geralt reluctantly came closer. ‘Just don’t be disappointed if it does nothing,’ he growled, some actual concern in his voice.

‘Yes, sure. Just make it good. You know, in case you never do it again.’ 

Geralt didn’t give it a second thought. 

He grabbed Jaskier and pulled him close as if he weighed nothing, tossing him around like a rag doll. Jaskier held on to him, barely managing to keep his balance, his fingers pulling on Geralt’s shirt. His eyes grew wide as he felt Geralt wrapping his hand around his waist, another supporting his spine and tipping him backwards. Suspended above the ground, he clawed at Geralt’s straining muscles, both uncomfortable and mildly impressed. 

Finally, Geralt leaned towards Jaskier and went for it. Sadly, it was no more than a lingering peck, completely impersonal. 

Jaskier whacked Geralt’s shoulder a few times, frustrated. 

Geralt smiled snidely in response, still not breaking away but keeping his lips pressed together, and the kiss shallow. The moment Jaskier accepted his fate, Geralt deepened it, perhaps too much, surprising him.

Jaskier grunted with disapproval but then, as Geralt turned from playful to passionate, he instantly eased into it, melting into Geralt’s arms, his displeased moans transforming into a satisfied rumble at the back of his throat. 

This somehow encouraged Geralt who became surprisingly involved, and then quickly pulled away, shocked by things turning so genuine. 

Jaskier was having none of that. He pulled Geralt back and returned the kiss in earnest, clinging on to him with iron determination.

Flora stared, startled, somehow more petrified than Jaskier. She cleared her throat to attract their attention but they ignored her. They were approaching the task with full dedication which had little to do with any princesses or even curses. After a while, they slowed down, both panting, fingers tangled in each other’s hair, faces flushed, hearts racing. 

Geralt looked at Jaskier. The image turned borderline hazy and he was surprised by a sudden influx of strong emotions, which he was afraid to give a name to. The most ridiculous, sentimental thoughts passed through his head, and he flinched. ‘Fuck.’ _Not again_. He blinked a few times but the feeling was not going away.

Then he stared down at Jaskier’s feet. When he looked back up, Geralt appeared as if he fell head first into a dark void. Even his hair was messy as if shaken the moment he hit the rock bottom. ‘Jaskier, fucking shit. Oh, gods.’

Jaskier froze, terrified. Although his legs felt normal now, it could have been an illusion. He spent a few seconds imagining his own slow and painful demise. ‘What?’ he asked, finally, afraid to look down. ‘Did it fail? Am I getting worse?’

‘No. Fuck, no. It worked like a dream.’

‘Oh.’ Jaskier lit up, feeling relieved and finally breathing easy, but then processed Geralt’s response. ‘ _Oh_.’ 

‘This can’t be true,’ Geralt growled with disbelief.

Jaskier was insulted but also a bit compassionate. Confronting his feelings was such a struggle for Geralt every single time. ‘Facts are facts,’ he shrugged, aiming for casual but his smugness was undeniable. ‘Things could have been much worse, though, right?’

‘Could they?’ Geralt didn’t seem convinced.

‘I’m going to go on a limb here and assume you didn’t really want me to turn into a statue. Am I right, Geralt? You don’t want your best friend in the whole wide world to die, correct?’

Geralt just grunted in response but didn’t seem entirely sure.

Jaskier tossed back his hair, some repressed anger in the movement, but remained undeterred. ‘It was a bit much, let’s admit, such an all or nothing situation, but…’ he was failing to hide his excitement. ‘I mean… At least this brings us _some_ clarity, some _much needed_ clarity, considering, _well_ …’

‘Shut up, Jaskier. Just-’

‘There’s no shame in having some feelings, especially positive ones.’ Jaskier smiled encouragingly but his expression faded as he met Geralt’s vacant eyes. 

Geralt massaged his temples with a groan. ‘Maybe this doesn’t really mean anything?’ he asked, trace amounts of hope in his voice.

‘Eeeeh…’ Jaskier was not quite sure how to respond and let out an uncomfortable laugh instead. 

When he stopped, the silence was deafening. 

‘We could…’ Jaskier started but was unable to continue because this beginning alone made Geralt appear _scared_ for a lack of a better word. ‘No, I don’t mean, _ehm_.’ He hesitated. ‘I just mean we could ignore the curse and just trust our guts. You know… Was that good for you by any chance? Not to be presumptuous but I had a strong feeling…’

Geralt’s eyes somehow managed to become even more distant. Jaskier swallowed, loudly.

‘This was not what it seemed,’ Geralt announced, angrily.

‘Right, yes, fine, of course. No, sure, I understand. That’s clear too, see?’ Jaskier blabbered on, sweating slightly. ‘We’re doing so well. Clarity all round. So much… _clarity_.’ His eyes grew wider and he sighed. ‘I might, just… I don’t know. Kill myself now, maybe?’

‘That would defeat the purpose.’

‘Well, yes, it would, wouldn’t it?’ Jaskier nodded eagerly. ‘In that case I can’t, surely. Who would want that kind of sacrifice to go to waste? I have to live so bloody long now, just to compensate… No death for me.’ He shook his head. ‘Killing monsters is one thing but this, I mean, oh boy. Maybe I should…’ he chuckled, unable to stop himself ‘…pay you.’

Geralt laughed despite himself and some of the tension dissolved into the air. 

‘Great,’ Jaskier sighed, relieved. ‘We have an answer now. We’re so… great.’ His awkwardness turned into intense sadness all of a sudden, eyes watering slightly.

‘Jaskier?’

‘What?’ 

‘Don’t… start this again. We’re upsetting her.’

Jaskier stared at Flora for a second as if he was surprised by her very existence. ‘How the fuck is she more important than me? She’s a bloody stranger.’ He turned to her, apologetic. ‘With all due respect, but it is what it is.’

She opened her mouth as if she wanted to say something, but he already turned away from her, upset and focused on Geralt.

‘Could you please acknowledge that something actually happened here? Can you? Can we finally moved past this fucking… repressive nonsense of yours, and stop tiptoeing around the issue?’

They both turned towards the door for a second, hearing it close behind Flora. 

Geralt shook his head and turned back to Jaskier. His eyes softened a bit, and he groaned quietly, annoyed with himself. ‘You will never give up on this, right?’

‘Right,’ Jaskier proclaimed with pride, his chest puffed slightly.

‘ _Fine_ ,’ he said with a sigh.

Jaskier stared at him in total disbelief. ‘Really?’ he asked, his voice overflowing with anticipation and hope.

Geralt just grunted in agreement, and shrugged his shoulders. 

And they lived happily ever after.

**Author's Note:**

> If you like my writing, please [subscribe to me](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blaire_Seton) and I'll bring you as many Geraskier fics as I can possibly produce. Also, follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/BlaireSeton) or [on Tumblr](http://oxbridge-quality-fanfiction-co.tumblr.com/) if you want to see what I'm up to.
> 
> This fic was inspired by Chapter 6 of [_The Spring of Burning Forests_](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24355795/chapters/58733140) where Jaskier composes a ballad about princesses and witchers to coax Geralt into a conversation about his feelings 😛
> 
> Big thanks to [Kelly](https://twitter.com/kneilsonphoto) for all the encouragement, great ideas and inspiration, and [Goshdraws](https://goshdraws.tumblr.com/) for your support and comments.


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